From The Confessional: Being Poor Is F*cking Exhausting

Not having money when it feels like everyone else has money is one of the toughest, most frustrating things in life.

There are many different variations of being poor, and all of them suck. Especially when you feel like you’re the only one you know personally who’s going through it. Everyone goes through milestones at different times, and when you feel behind financially it can swallow you whole.

Knowing that generational wealth and the opportunities that branch out from that aren’t anything you can control doesn’t make being poor suck any less, does it? NOPE. And these confessions are laying it all out there.

Confessional #25835670

“Tired of being poor. I don't even want that much in life.”

Confessional #25824316

“I’m so tired of being poor..barely making ends meet has aged me:(”

Confessional #25822143

“One of the worst (and least understood) things about being poor is the lack of choice. You can never choose something based on what you truly like and want... it's always based on what you can afford.”

Confessional #25808645

“I work too hardtoo much to be this poor. Single sucks. Can’t afford anything on one income. Being poor makes me feel worthless”

It doesn’t matter how much or how often you work. It doesn’t matter how much you budget and pinch pennies. Sh*t is expensive and when you don’t have the money, you don’t have the money.

Confessional #25795047

“Being poor makes me so sad. I work full time and still don’t make enough to make ends meet. My adult kids seem to be following my footsteps. I’m sorry, i failed as a role model. I just can’t get ahead no matter what i do.”

Confessional #25762464

“Oh yay, we open presents tomorrow. I can hardly wait for the disappointment because I didn’t have the money for much. Pj pants, slippers, and sheets. Being poor is so heartbreaking.”

Confessional #25760893

“I was bullied at school for being poor and 20 years later that bully is homeless, karma is a bitch .”

Confessional #25751723

“I am a teacher. I love teaching but I am tired of being poor. Seriously considering doing sexwork on the side to help make ends meet.”

Raise your hand if you work full-time and also perform side hustles for extra money. See? It’s no wonder Americans are so ignorant about the world at large and so miserable. We don’t make enough money to travel, and when we do, we can’t f*cking get time off work to go somewhere.

Confessional #24189675

“Being poor is really hard. With kids in the mix makes it worse. Puke worthy worse.”

Confessional #24020364

“I just want to get my teeth fixed. I want my smile to match how I feel. Being poor is the fucking worst.”

Confessional #22841965

“H has gone from a professional white collar career to mowing lawns and we are almost destitute. Being poor just sucks the life right out of a person.”

Confessional #22487222

“Caught my 2 small DS trying to steal a toy from a store. I put it back thankfully no one else noticed. I hate being poor and having to say no all the time. Lectured them almost to the point of tears. I hope this gets better.”

Not having enough money to be able to do for your kids everything you want to do for your kids is heartbreaking. Absolutely heartbreaking and so stressful.

Confessional #21001423

“Being poor is hell. I cant pay our property taxes, trash bill, have our vehicle repaired, or take my dog to the vet (& she needs medication). I feel so worthless - I wish I would die.”

Confessional #18140614

“I have a love/hate relationship with holidays. I enjoy them or want to but honestly being poor makes holidays hard. I have been stressing about Halloween costumes for months and I'm now stressing about Christmas”

Confessional #18048408

“My daughter turns 16 on the 10th. Don't think I will have money to get her the game system she wants. FML I hate being poor :(”

Confessional #17779637

“I’m so tired of being poor. It doesn’t seem to matter what we do, there’s never enough money. I’m starting to wonder what is the point? Would almost rather be dead than live in this hell.”

Being poor sucks and no one who benefits from living in a capitalist system should invalidate that. Beign poor with kids sucks even harder. Can you be rich in love? Of course, and many families are even if things are tight. But love doesn’t pay the bills. Turns out money actually does solve most problems!

The post From The Confessional: Being Poor Is F*cking Exhausting appeared first on Scary Mommy.

From The Confessional: If You’re Trapped In A Red State (Or County), You’re Not Alone

Prior to 2016, many of us Dems could actually have constructive, respectful conversations with Republicans. I know I could. Before Trump systematically tore our country apart with his hateful rhetoric, endless power-grabbing, and complete absence of moral code or integrity, I was able to see where conservatives were coming from. I was able to meet them in the middle. And I could respect why they voted the way they did, even if we disagreed.

Everything is different now, and we can thank the Republican party and their creepy, undying support for a wannabe dictator for that. Now, families are divided. Friendships have ended. And everyone is fighting. It’s gotten so ugly in America that many of us have said, “I’m done” when it comes to our family and friends on the other side. We are done trying to save you from your warped AF QAnon, Trump-loving, backasswards, Fox News-brainwashed beliefs. We hope you get out, get free of the delusion, but until then, we don’t have time or space in our lives for the hate, for the racism, for the homophobia, or for the name Trump anymore.

Confessional #25830918

“I’m uncomfortable with how many of my Conservative friends & family who believe that a higher power placed Donald Trump in office but don’t believe that the same happened for Joe Biden. Way to only have “faith” when your guy wins.”

Confessional #25822697

“Super religious republican in-laws started excluding me (& DH/DC) from get togethers. Pretty sure it's bc I'm forward thinking/pro choice/pro mask. I'm never disrespectful, nor do I argue or even discuss my views w/ them. Imagine being that intolerant.”

Confessional #25835268

“Can’t wait for the conservative in-laws to visit our new house and see the Pride flag flying and the BLM sign. If they don’t like it, they can leave. I’m not catering to their bigotry.”

Confessional #25809955

“Downside to living in the same town as your entire republican family: impossible to come up with an excuse to miss Christmas wo alienating them all further. Fuck the brainwashing GOP garbage. You ruined my family 4 ur $$ & power”

It’s a heartbreaking reality to accept that your extended family are stuck in the archaic, patriarchal, conservative Republican cult. But they’re stubbornly staying there, so sometimes, you have to say goodbye and move on.

Confessional #25829882

“i have grown to hate conservative media/radio so much. dh is brainwashed and cannot have empathy or care for anything. we are very fortunate but all he sees is higher taxes instead of seeing a positive forward society. sick of it.”

Confessional #25824444

“love dh but conservative talk radio has made him cynical, hateful, and judgemental. i want my dh back.”

Confessional #25819261

“My dh is so indoctrinated by conservative rhetoric that he thinks the rioters were right. I can't anymore. We need social reform now!”

Conservative talk radio and Fox News has successfully brainwashed many people we love—including our husbands. We miss them, and we wish they’d come back from the dark side.

Confessional #25819747

“i will not vote republican again for any office. they knew he was guilty yet refused to impeach. i am done with the republican party and conservative politics. bring on democratic socialism and a more dignified and sane society!”

Confessional #25829097

“it scares me that we are so close to letting right wing crazies take over america. can't even watch handmaids tale cause it is to scary to me. i stopped voting conservative once i realized what their true agenda was. dh is pissed but getting over it.”

Confessional #25815821

“former republican of 30 years. i voted dem all the way across the ticket from state level to president. i am so angry w/how our country is being taken over by wealthy men who keep it all and refuse to pay their taxes. come on joe. don't let me down.”

Confessional #25799046

“former republican voter leaning democrat. realized the cluster fuck this country has become. let's be reasonable and stop funding millionaires and their friends while we get nothing.”

Thankfully, more and more Republicans are seeing the light and fleeing the hate and the corruption. Together, we can save America as long as we keep voting for leaders who believe in equal rights, equal protection, and healthcare for all.

Confessional #25824055

“progressive christian surrounded by conservatives who think we all need to be just like them. they are hateful and difficult to deal with. they hate everything.. i got tired of the hate. now i stay quiet or they turn on me.”

Confessional #25829059

“if i suddenly had $$ of my own life would change. i'd move to a more enlightened place and live a more modern lifestyle. right now i live in a conservative backwards place where racism and patriarchy rule. seems nice on the surface, but it's UGLY.”

Confessional #25815757

“this fucking conservative area is grating on me. my views have changed over the past year and i can't go back to believing the bullshit. dh is happy w/being a trump supporter. you see where this is going. scared shitless.”

Confessional #25805063

“I live in a state where the Republicans are blocking Democratic leaders from putting precautions in place against Covid... even though our positive rate is close to 30%!!!! And the Republicans are confused why they lost the election?”

There are still many, many conservatives pockets in America that have people trapped, however. Towns, entire states even, where it’s hard to find a safe person to connect with.

Confessional #25817856

“started out as homeschooling conservative christian. still homeschooling, but more liberal and progressive. we look back and laugh at what we thought way back then. then we see the horrible behavior of the religious right. glad to see religion dying out.”

Confessional #25817135

“fell into extreme conservative religion years ago. we raised our kids this way until they were late elementary age. we came out of it, but the remnants harmed us all. now we live w/o church, but i feel sad for the wasted $, stress, and time. sorry kids.”

Confessional #25811918

“now identify as progressive christian. could not do conservative right wing anymore. so ashamed of how i thought and acted then. realize american right wing xtian movement has destroyed lives and our country. hope we can recover.”

Confessional #25810297

“admitting that i am no longer an evangelical xtian is scary. still believe in a kinder gentler god concept thanks to mr fred rogers and his testimony. can't tell anymore around me. all red extreme conservatives. sad i used to be that way.”

But the fight continues. Conservative Christians are fleeing the backwards, archaic rules that have kept them down, and are instead, embracing a new list of rules—like encouraging women to take whatever path they choose in life, supporting women’s rights to control their own bodies, and knowing that “love is love” and all that matters is that you’re kind to one another.

Confessional #25828266

“conservatives i know are going nuts because they know their dominance is being overturned. i am loving it. relishing the new freedoms coming for all of us. told H times change and we should be glad. the old days were not so great per my grandma.”

Confessional #25801990

“I feel like throwing a fucking party every time I see another story from another Republican stating she is voting for all Democrats this time. I fucking love it!”

Confessional #25800799

“done with the republican party. voting democrat from top to bottom this time. give them the boot, ladies!”

Confessional #25819729

“What in the actual fuck? I have always thought of myself as a split-ticket purple-state moderate, but I honestly can’t see myself EVER voting for a Replicant again after today. My conservative family & husb would horrified to hear me say that.”

As American icon Bob Dylan famously said… the times they are a-changin… We can take comfort in hearing story after story of former conservative or former Republican seeing the absolute mockery Trump made of this country and switching their allegiance away from that corrupt, hypocritical, oppressive, Jim-Bob-loving cult and instead, step into the light.

If you’re trapped in a red state or red city, or your family is brainwashed and you don’t know how to talk to them, you can sit with us. We’re here, supporting the Bidens and Kamala, fighting for LGBTQIA+ rights, celebrating the beautiful diversity of America’s many ethnicities and races and religions, and trying to heal from the harm that Trump and his minions have done.

There’s a place for you here, at our table. We’ll bring the coffee, you bring the donuts.

The post From The Confessional: If You’re Trapped In A Red State (Or County), You’re Not Alone appeared first on Scary Mommy.

From The Confessional: I Hate Being On Birth Control

Birth control is not for the weak, that’s for sure. Moms are sounding off in this week’s Confessions about how much it can suck.

Because we live in eternal patriarchy, birth control for non-penis-havers is a complicated process. There are a variety of options, and none of them come free of side effects. And it seems like the older we all get, the harder it is to find suitable birth control options.

That’s why this week’s Confessions post is dedicated to all the moms out there who are on birth control and absolutely hate it—you deserve a space to be seen, and a space to bitch and moan about birth control. Full stop.

Confessional #25835598

“For the first time in our marriage I can feel sex. I had no idea what hormonal birth control was doing to me. I never even used to feel the nipple play until last night”

Confessional #25829746

“This is fun. Day 19 of bleeding after starting birth control to stop PMS sxs & stop periods.”

Confessional #25828829

“Started birth control to stop PMS symptoms & periods. Have been bleeding since April 7th.”

Confessional #25827912

“Started taking birth control to manage PMS sxs and have been bleeding for longer than past periods. WTF?!”

The erratic period cycles that can come with birth control are a BITCH. They’re unpredictable, sometimes they’re early AF, sometimes they’re late, and sometimes they don’t come at all. Pass. Do better, science.

Confessional #25800778

“I forgot to get back on my birth control and lost 5 pounds! Sorry hubby... this is way better than sex.”

Confessional #25797918

“My sex drive is gone... hoping it’s just my birth control and once I am off it things will be better. Two under 4; I’d rather have sleep than sex.”

Confessional #25271043

“sick of birth control pill prescription being held hostage forcing a yearly pelvic exam here in the u.s. why are they not over the counter yet? I still have to go for yearly pap smear when science says 2-4 yrs. talk about wasted medical dollars.”

Confessional #23802235

“Birth control gives me horrible side effects so I can’t take them. Tried the iud and it tore through my uterus, I had to be upside down spread eagled while they fished around for it thru my vagina for 5 hours, My H hates condoms so I’m always stressed”

Hormonal birth control can really wreak havoc on your body. People with PCOS and endometriosis especially have a rough time with hormonal birth control. One alternative to that is a copper IUD, which is great, but also—the IUD insertion process can be downright AWFUL.

Confessional #23312667

“I got an IUD 4 months ago. I have have my period for 4 months now.”

Confessional #20598898

“i regret getting the mirena iud. it’s completely changed my body & the hormones make me insane. i’ve gained 55 pounds. i have pcos now. the iud is stuck in my uterine wall & i need surgery. can’t afford it. i’m a prisoner in my own body now.”

Confessional #19674130

“Got the IUD and my cramps have never been worse. I literally might pull it out myself tonight, Idk if I can stomach the adjustment period. It's been a full month and I haven't even used it for thr "fun part" ”

Confessional #17865107

“Took the iud out a month ago and lost 10 lbs and skin is clearing up. Maybe sticking a foreign object up ones hoohaa really does have adverse effects. But so does pregnancy.”

Long-term birth control is invasive and expensive, and birth control pills aren’t available over the counter. Sure, there are other options that aren’t hormonal or super invasive (the patch, diaphragms, spermicide, and natural family planning). But it also shouldn’t be so difficult on our bodies when we want a more effective and reliable method of birth control.

Thankfully, the pill is safe for women over 35 (it didn’t used to be, as older birth control pills were made with a lot of estrogen which could increase the risk of blood clots). But it’s still a PITA.

If you’re on birth control and you resent it sometimes (or all the time), you’re not alone. Your feelings are valid and you’re welcome to vent in our Confessional anytime!

The post From The Confessional: I Hate Being On Birth Control appeared first on Scary Mommy.

From The Confessional: These BFF Breakups Are Petty AF

Friend breakups are super common—and now we’re actually going to talk about them

We’ve all been through it—a friend breakup. One day, you’re BFFs and the next day, you’re both in completely different phases of life and feel like two ships passing in the night. Romantic breakups get all the attention, all the love songs, and all the tear-jerker movies. But breaking up with a friend can really, really, really cut deep.

Sometimes, on the other hand, it can feel more like “good riddance.” Some friends break up for the pettiest reasons, some break up for some really messed up reasons.

Let’s dive into why these moms are confessing all about their friend breakups!

Confessional #25834707

“I don't want to be best friends with my best friend anymore. In fact I'm pretty sure if I never saw her again that be completely fine with me. I've really lost respect for her for some of the things she's done over the last year.”

Confessional #25828049

“We have a former friend who who was extremely demanding and obnoxious.  Today today, she'd today be called a Karen.  Back then, we just called her "The Bitch"”

Confessional #24411941

“Dear former friend, Just because you finalized your divorce does NOT mean you can reach out to MY DH for “advice/friendship.” I see right thru your BS. We may have our struggles right now, but he’s still MINE.”

Confessional #22872023

“Dear former friend: fuck you for stabbing me in the back. I trusted you and you used me. Now you throw me under the bus at work?! Nope. You just made yourself look bad. You lied and now you got caught. Thats what you get.”

Maybe you’ve known your ex-friend since elementary school. Maybe you met in college. Maybe they’re a neighbor or a co-worker. Either way, people break off friendships all the time—sometimes for petty reasons, sometimes for really f*cked up reasons.

Confessional #21960032

“Former friend claims she worked hard for everything. Was that before or after her parents paid for her education, her huge wedding, and provided free child care? Such fucking privilege, and she doesn’t even recognize it.”

Confessional #20651033

“A former friend was so smug and superior about her great marriage, how much money her H made, and how she never had to work. Yep, I chuckled when I heard he cheated and left her.”

Confessional #17754374

“Former friend is getting a divorce after her long rants about how she had her husband wrapped around her finger. She’s a nasty bitch who deserves it. Done blame the husband one bit. I like his new girlfriend, too.”

Confessional #17535845

“I left nasty, anonymous comments on a former friends' blog. Part of me feels a bit cowardly and slimy, but another part of me is glad I unburdened myself. Trust me, she more than deserved it.”

A lot of moms in the Confessional are calling out their former friends for pretending like their lives were perfect for social media, but behind the scenes, things were a totally different story.

Confessional #16878484

“A former friend pisses me off. She used to be snarky about people going on vacation (since she could not afford them), and she shamed them for not dieting. Now she is on vacation and overweight. Wonder if she recognizes her hypocrisy.”

Confessional #16649403

“Former friend moved to a super-conservative area in the South. her kids hate it and have already been bullied. But, the power of Jesus is strong there, I guess...”

Confessional #15597799

“A former friend used to brag about her great marriage, how much money her husband made, and how she'd never go on disability. Now, she's getting divorced, the STBX is saying horrible shit about her (all true), and she's applying for disability. KARMA!”

Confessional #13419124

“My immature, self-absorbed, shit stirring friend cut me out of her life because I wasn't "being supportive" enough. It hurt at first real bad but now I have time to focus on the real grown-ups in my life. Thanks former friend!!!”

Do you have a friend in your life that you wish you could cut ties with? Or maybe you have a friend who ghosted you? Once we get to a certain age or phase in life, it’s normal for friendships to change and grow. But sometimes growing can only happen without one another.

Especially if that friend is trying to put the moves on your husband, like some of these confessions imply!

Confessional #1711241

“I just hired a private investigator to follow my former friend, which is also my DH's former affair. I am just lending Karma a helping hand with this piece of shit. You're welcome.”

Confessional #1698746

“I heard some former friends aren't doing well, I feel bad because it makes me feel so good.”

Confessional #1680685

“Snooped through DH phone and saw a former friend of mine has texted him a few times. Nothing inappropriate but it makes me want to cut a bitch.”

Confessional #1636608

“I have a former friend whose life is now a mess. I keep her a Facebook friend bc I can't stop watching the train wreck but the stupid, ignorant things she posts infuriate me. I don't know why I can't just unfriend her.”

Do you have a former friend you keep tabs on via Facebook? Personally, I’ve lost a couple of friends/acquaintances this past year (who hasn’t?) and, of course, they’re still friends with my husband on Facebook. They just can’t quit me entirely, I guess! Enjoy the show, I say.

Confessional #1589831

“I hope all my former friends get pregnant and all of their friends treat them like a contagious disease and abandon them too.”

Confessional #1587820

“Found out recently DH has had a 3 yr affair with a former friend of mine. No words can describe the heartache I feel. People are cruel. I don't know how to move on or let go. Feeling so broken.”

Confessional #1579917

“Found out two weeks ago that DH has been having a three year affair with a former friend. Can't understand how someone vows to love, honor and cherish you and the destroys you.”

Confessional #1312527

“I found naked pictures of a former friend on the internet and it was the best part of my week. She looks like shit. ”

There’s a saying that applies to a lot of these former friends mentioned here…hmm, how does it go again? Oh, right. “Jealousy is a disease! Get well soon.”

The post From The Confessional: These BFF Breakups Are Petty AF appeared first on Scary Mommy.

From The Confessional: Mean Girls Suck

We all knew them growing up. Maybe you were their target. Maybe you were one of them yourself. But rarely does any girl get through childhood and adolescence untouched in some way by the mean girls. And then, just when you think “Oh, good. I’m done with that bullshit”… NOPE. You find out that mean girls often grow up to be mean moms, raising the next generation of Regina Georges. And round and round we go.

It’s on us, moms, to break the cycle. We have to raise kind girls. We have to raise girls who include others, who lift each other up, and who don’t seek out opportunities to embarrass others and make them feel small. And it requires active, constant, parenting. Far too often parents don’t even realize they’re raising a mean girl until they find out their kid did or said something unkind and hurtful.

And since we all knew, growing up, exactly who the mean girls were (and since we still see “mean girl” behavior in grown ass women who never matured past middle school), our confessional is chock full of mean girl stories. Stories from women who are still hurting, 30 years later, and stories from moms reliving the horror as they realize that the same catty bullshit is happening to their own kids.

Confessional #25833689

“Is there a diplomatic way to say "actually your mom is a mean girl bitch with shitty skin" when her kids say she is a beauty and a Saint? After 15 years I'm tired of the flying monkeys.”

Confessional #25750472

“Can spot a bitch a mile away. The mean girls in DD’s grade (third) dress just like their grown up mean girl mamas- athleisure (LuLuLemon) and messy top buns. Told DD to kill them with kindness. Can’t believe the pettiness starts so young.”

Confessional #25815314

“My "friend" hasn't matured past 16. She still acts like she's a mean girl in high-school, except that she's just a frumpy middle aged mom.”

Confessional #24726977

“Church has the worst mean girls. Middle Aged Mean Girls. I wouldn’t even care except that their spawn might hurt my little girl’s feelings. Then my husband and I have agreed that the gloves will come off.”

Recognizing mean girl moms feels like a punch in the face, as their behavior takes you back the the horribleness of 7th grade all over again. And even more heartbreaking, they’re raising the next generation.

Confessional #25754595

“My stupid co-worker reported me today over such bullshit. Some people should not be in any position of any kind of authority over others. Hate the mean girls at work, I'll be outta there as soon as I can”

Confessional #25753533

“I hope the "mean girl moms" know how small they make me feel when they pretend I don't exist. When I'm standing right next to them. I hope one day they have to experience that feeling for themselves, and I hope they are overcome with shame.”

Confessional #24934233

“Is it worse that they leave me out on purpose or if they just don’t think about me at all? Mean Girls: 30’s version”

And sometimes we even feel the “mean girl” effect on us, as adults—when we’re excluded, or ignored, or we find out they’re talking about us behind our back. It still hurts just as much as it did back then.

Confessional #25818602

“I cut out all my toxic..drama queen..draining as fuck friends. I hate feeling so drained after hanging out with them. We’re in our 50’s and 60’s but they behave like high school girls. Plastic mean girls never outgrow it!”

Confessional #25761423

“A few of my female co-workers are freezing me out and I'm so relieved. They're mean girls and I didn't like being associated with them. I'm gonna call it a win.”

Confessional #23864674

“I had a friend who sent out a mass email about a friend in our mommy group's unibrow with a photo. Nasty mean girls don't end in high school. Cut ties with her, better off with no 'friends'.”

Honestly, the best thing we can do is cut them out. It’s not always easy to do, but if you can remove the mean girls from your inner circle (even if that means your inner circle gets very, very small), you’re better off.

Confessional #25817822

“SIL and MIL are a pair of fake, demanding bitchy mean girls. I’ll put up with them for DH’s sake, but after this weekend I am DONE subjecting my DD and DS to their bullshit.”

Confessional #25791392

“My mom and SM often behave like un-self aware, entitled 70-something mean girls.”

Confessional #25788028

“My first mean girl experience was as a kid being raised by my narcissistic mother. School was the least of my worries & I was jealous of the kids who actually wanted to go home at 3 o'clock.”

Confessional #25592145

“Under the sweet-humble-grateful mask SIL hides behind, is a self satisfied entitled, covert narcissist, closet mean girl bully. SIL's been to catty too me not to believe it. Somehow, it's twisted so I'm the "bitch", tho. She's exactly like my sister.”

The worst is when you’re related to mean girls—by marriage or by blood. You might still have to see them on holidays or feel the effects well into adulthood of how they shaped your upbringing. Hopefully you can channel that pain to inspire you even more to raise kind kids.

Confessional #25785264

“Looked up the mean girl from HS online -perfect man, job, kids, house. Haven’t seen her since graduation. Called her at work pretending to be a woman confessing to affair with her husband. Revenge only took 25 years.”

Confessional #25765087

“I still think about how the “mean girls” treated me in college. I’m 35.”

Confessional #23425250

“I let former HS mean girls friend requests sit in limbo on my FB account. No, you can't spy on my awesome life. Enjoy your mediocrity. You earned it.”

And if you’re still bitter and wanting to get revenge on that bitch who made your teenage years miserable, we get it. It can be hard to let that shit go.

Confessional #25801897

“Teen DD's friends dropped her because we don't let her socialize (because of covid). Heart hurts for her and mad at those mean girls.”

Confessional #25768431

“My 10 year old daughter had a friend that now treats her like shit. I wish I could punch the little brat in the face. My poor daughter keeps wondering what she did wrong. Nothing dear. The little girl is just one of those mean girls.”

Confessional #25757593

“Seeing DD8 cry about the mean girls makes me cry, I remember how it felt to just want to fit in. Still feel that way, ‘cause mean girls grow up to be mean women. Teach your kids to be inclusive and kind! It makes such a difference!”

Confessional #23715066

“A little mean girl was cruel to DD9 today. Trying to teach my girl about resilience and what true friends are, but really I just want to go slap the little brat who made my baby cry.”

The ultimate pain, however, is when mean girls hurt your kids. You know you need to let your kids navigate some of it on their own, like you did, but damn do you wish you could protect your baby from those little brats.

Confessional #23959025

“I hate being a mother. I don’t like the way my daughters are. They’re completely different than how I raised them. They are the mean girls from the movies. They hate each other and I don’t know how to stop it”

Confessional #25751684

“Today, I found out that my daughter is not only a mean girl, but a bully. Where did I go wrong? My heart is in pieces and I swear I didn't raise her like that.”

Confessional #25470050

“Today, I found out DD11 has been a mean girl at camp. Where did I go wrong?? I know everyone says "not my kid!" But I never expected her to be this way. So disappointed. I raised her better than that. I blame myself and I am sickened.”

Again, we cannot just assume our kids aren’t mean. Even when we do our best, our girls can get sucked into “mean girl” culture. We have to talk to them about bullying, get to know their friends, observe how they interact with their peers, and make sure they are kind and inclusive.

The ugly truth is that mean girls aren’t going anywhere. They’ll grow up, stay mean, and raise the next crop of insufferable mean girls. It’s on you and it’s on me to ensure that our kids aren’t a part of it. To ensure that not only are our kids not mean, but that they have the courage to stand up to those bitches and deflate the air in their balloons as well. It’s on us to talk to our girls about what to do when they witness bullying and to be upstanders, not bystanders.

It’s crucial, as parents, that we fight mean girl culture. Because all of our kids deserve better.

The post From The Confessional: Mean Girls Suck appeared first on Scary Mommy.

From The Confessional: Empty Nest Syndrome Is Real AF

Some moms think empty nest syndrome is liberating, some feel, well, empty and sad. Either way, it’s real AF.

We’ve all heard about empty nest syndrome. Most motherhood pain points surround parenting small children, young kids, and adolescents. But where is the support for moms who feel lonely after their kids move out and “fly the coop,” so to speak?

Empty nest syndrome is the grief that many parents feel when their children move out of the home. This condition is typically more common in women, because moms are, of course, more likely to have had the role of primary caregiver.

Regardless of how your empty nest affects you, you’re not alone. The moms in our Confessional are talking about it all the time. Some are grieving, some are looking forward to the day their kids move out, and some are ready to make a radical mid-life change for themselves—buckle up.

Confessional #25833436

“I'm quickly coming up on 50 - almost an empty nester, about ready to kick my H out of the house and file for divorce and I'm retraining for a new career. I think life actually starts at 50!! Wish me luck :)”

Confessional #25819549

“I am counting down the days until we are empty nesters and it is just my husband & I again. DS is only 7...”

Confessional #25807604

“Almost empty nesters and I am kind of turned off in general by my dh lately. I struggle with suicidal ideation already and I don’t think I’m strong enough to pretend the rest of my life but he is a good guy.”

Confessional #25795894

“I’m exhausted. Empty nesters here, and because I don’t earn a paycheck- husband expects me to be his servant. I’ve been having a panic attack since 10am, and he’s enjoying the sandwich that I made. Fuck this bullshit.”

Symptoms of empty nest syndrome can include depression, a sense of loss of purpose, feelings of rejection, or worry, stress, and anxiety over the child’s welfare. Parents who experience empty nest syndrome often question whether or not they have prepared enough for their child to live independently.

Confessional #25789807

“I thought I enjoyed being a mom, but I really hated it. These empty nest years are so relaxing and wonderful. And I definitely don’t want grandchildren.”

Confessional #25787463

“Empty nester here, retired last year. H, 5 yrs younger, still working. I'm online all day, as soon as he leaves. I fake having "household projects" but I simply drink wine, snack & surf the net until he returns - then I act really busy.”

Confessional #25787377

“Hoping my adult children wait a very long time to procreate because I don't think I'm cut out for hands on grandparenting after all. I love this peace of empty nest far more than I imagined.”

Confessional #25778505

“The thought of being an empty nester with my hubby is sickening”

Other symptoms seem to include: relief that there’s finally enough time for yourself and not wanting to be alone with your husband.

Confessional #25761749

“Empty nest stinks. DC come home and we are “so going to do this or that Mom” but they are on their phones, catching up on shows, meeting up w friends, no conversation...I know it’s probably normal but it still hurts.”

Confessional #25106987

“22 year old son moved out today. I thought I wouldn’t feel sad at all, like I was immune to the empty nest syndrome. Talked about not missing him eating everything in the pantry and making messes . I’ve been kidding myself. I want my baby back.”

Confessional #25096080

“Even after I was an empty nester, I maintained a very close relationship with my daughter and son. If either of their significant others tried split that bond, I would off them. Noone comes between me and my kids.”

Confessional #24924957

“My DH and I are empty nesters. If I divorced him my kids would be heartbroken. Same reason I don’t put down their beloved 18 year old cat who pisses everywhere. Actually the cat is more tolerable than DH.”

The plus sides to an empty nest are much lower grocery bills, fewer messes, less laundry, and less guilt over buying things you want for yourself just because. And who knows, the kitchen sink might actually be tolerable and not a place where anxiety goes to die. For awhile, anyway.

The negatives, aside from the obvious grief and subsequent adjustment period: remembering how to function with your spouse when it’s just the two of you again. Though some people find a way…

Confessional #22188804

“For the past couple of months, when MIL calls H to see if he can take her to the store, he doesn't answer. Because we're in bed fucking like teenagers, and don't want to be bothered. Let us enjoy our empty nest on the weekends, FFS! We've earned this!”

Confessional #23917377

“My husband has put his hands on me 6 times in our 36 yr marriage. We’re empty nesters now and I told him if it ever happens again I’ll kick his balls up into his body and have his ass arrested”

Confessional #20673600

“DH and I got married at 17. Had 5 children by 25. He insisted on having them when we were young. Now at 48 we are empty nesters and it is so refreshing. Downsized to a 2 BR. Glad that at least one of us had some foresight.”

Confessional #17571445

“The one advantage of having my son at age 20 is that I am already an empty nester. And it is GLORIOUS!”

Confessional #16980821

“about 8 years from empty nest. great kids but I wonder what to do when I no longer homeschool them. have not worked in over 20yrs-sahm/homeschool.loved it, but lost myself in the process. I still wonder what might have been had I pursued job-not marriage”

If you’re struggling with an empty nest, you’re valid in those feelings. If you’re grieving your kids’ absence while also enjoying a little free time, a little “me” time—you’re 100% valid and deserving of that too!

 

The post From The Confessional: Empty Nest Syndrome Is Real AF appeared first on Scary Mommy.

From The Confessional: My Husband Needs To Go Back To The F*cking Office

After a year of everyone working from home, these moms are O-V-E-R I-T

Living at home, working from home, raising kids at home, helping them attend school from home, and keeping up on all the things that need upkeep in the home for over a year is, well, killing us. Spending all of that time with your spouse or partner is honestly just unnatural and bad for the human condition.

And these moms are taking to our Confessional to tell us just how OVER IT they all are. From chewing too loudly, to burping and farting and ball-scratching all day, these wives are absolutely ready for the men in their lives to go back to the office already!

Confessional #25829161

“My work from home hubs is ALWAYS AROUND and I need my spaceeeee. We never have sex and barely get along. I need him to go away sometimes.”

Confessional #25828946

“I can’t fucking stand when my husband decides he is going to work from home “today” Go to the office!!! FFS!!!! geez-us.”

Confessional #25828263

“Fully vaccinated h needs to get the FUCK back to his office. I can not stand another day of keeping the kids quiet so he can work from home.”

One common thing that a lot of women have discussed during the pandemic is the fact that their husbands need peace and quiet, a closed office, and to basically pretend they’re not even home during their work day but totally expect their wives to work amid the chaos AND keep the kids from “bothering” their dad.

And to that, we say, OH HELL NO.

Confessional #25826950

“My dh has been work from home for over a year now and I need him to get the fuck out of my house before I lose my mind. Stop taking so many breaks; always shitting and/or eating.”

Confessional #25823590

“DH has no friends and it’s negatively impacting both of us. He expects me to fulfill all of his friend needs and acts passive aggressive for days when I see my friends. We both work from home and I see him 24 hours a day 7 days a week. I need a break!”

Confessional #25821821

“I'm ready for a break. Even though September the kids go back to school, dh will continue to work from home. I hate him.”

Confessional #25815148

“Ever since DH started to work from home I have lost control over our 2 yr old and 4 yr old because he babies they're fucking tantrums. I AM MISERABLE. Fuck you COVID! I want my husband TF out out during work hours!!”

If you’ve been a stay-at-home mom or work from home mom since the Before Times, then you likely have a routine down that’s a sacred component to balancing your productivity and mental wellbeing. Men do not observe peace; they are basically genetically wired to disturb it. All the time. In any way they can. And even if you’re new to working from home, but are now doing it alongside your spouse, you might feel this way too.

It’s no wonder so many women are MORE than ready for their men to GTFO of the house again.

Confessional #25804210

“DH has been working from home since late March & it has really put a strain on our marriage. Now his job is considering having them work from home permanently. If this is the case, it will be the end of our marriage.”

Confessional #25785122

“H has decided to work from home as much as possible because someone in his office tested positive for Covid. He refuses to wear a mask when grocery shopping though. Now I have to see his idiotic face all day.”

Confessional #25779917

“My husband has to work from home for the next month. It just started today. I'm already annoyed AF.”

Wouldn’t it be amazing if husbands just pulled their weight and did everything they were supposed to do and stayed out of everyone’s hair when they needed to?

Confessional #25772184

“We both work from home. So, guess who is homeschooling? At least he is good in bed...”

Confessional #25765332

“My h doesn't have to go to work at regular hours. He can work from home, or go in & come back at different times every day. I never know in advance if he's going to be here or not. I ABSOLUTELY HATE THIS!!!”

Confessional #25750647

“H decided, unexpectedly, to work from home today. A lovely, bright September day has been ruined by his presence here.”

Basically, there’s a reason all of these women are annoyed that their husbands are working from home and disturbing their space. It has nothing to do with love and everything to do with patriarchal oblivion. New motto: get your vax and get back to the office!

The post From The Confessional: My Husband Needs To Go Back To The F*cking Office appeared first on Scary Mommy.

From The Confessional: Grown-Up Mean Girls Are The F*cking Worst

Mean girls: they grow up to be parents of mean kids, teachers, nurses, and even our neighbors. These confessions about mean girls are downright JUICY.

The thing about mean girls is that they’re usually mean as kids for reasons beyond their control. Meaning they were likely victims of their own parents or home environment. But the thing to remember as they grow up is that even victims can be perpetrators. It’s a vicious, mean girl cycle that never quits. Especially when there’s a huge lack of self-awareness happening. It doesn’t always look like Regina George, either.

The moms in our Confessional this week are spilling allllll the tea about the mean girls in their lives: friends, relatives, women down the street, fellow parents, and even their kids’ classmates. Once a mean girl, always a mean girl in many cases—we’re all victim to a patriarchal society, after all. But that doesn’t mean we have to put up with that sh*t.

Paging Desperate Housewives 2.0, amiright?

Confessional #25831145

“I live in a mean girl suburb. The women all want to claim they are kind and care about each other but the reality is much different. There is a thin line between love and hate”

Confessional #25818602

“I cut out all my toxic..drama queen..draining as fuck friends. I hate feeling so drained after hanging out with them. We’re in our 50’s and 60’s but they behave like high school girls. Plastic mean girls never outgrow it!”

Confessional #25817822

“SIL and MIL are a pair of fake, demanding bitchy mean girls. I’ll put up with them for DH’s sake, but after this weekend I am DONE subjecting my DD and DS to their bullshit.”

Confessional #25815575

“I find poetic justice in the middle school/highschool mean girl's daughters being two of the most hideous little trolls I've ever seen. Sorry bitch, all the nice clothes and hair bows don't make them less ugly.”

The worst is when you’ve been friends with someone for a long time and you grow up, but they…don’t. Many an adult friendship has been ruined because of this kind of divide.

Confessional #25815314

“My "friend" hasn't matured past 16. She still acts like she's a mean girl in high-school, except that she's just a frumpy middle aged mom.”

Confessional #25807916

“We live in a military base and our little neighborhood is filled with a bunch of bitchy mean girls who single out my daughter with no shame. I hope they all get fat in their teenage years.”

Confessional #25801897

“Teen DD's friends dropped her because we don't let her socialize (because of covid). Heart hurts for her and mad at those mean girls.”

HOO BOY did the pandemic bring all the mean girls to the yard, huh? Coming out of the woodwork with their judgment and cliques. All the more reason to stay six feet away, Linda!

Confessional #25799131

“These "mean girl" moms I avoid, their kid just joined my son's team. Damn, I hate having to be fake-nice.”

Confessional #25785264

“Looked up the mean girl from HS online -perfect man, job, kids, house. Haven’t seen her since graduation. Called her at work pretending to be a woman confessing to affair with her husband. Revenge only took 25 years.”

Confessional #25770505

“I still despise the mean girl from my HS just as much now as I did back then.”

Confessional #25768431

“My 10 year old daughter had a friend that now treats her like shit. I wish I could punch the little brat in the face. My poor daughter keeps wondering what she did wrong. Nothing dear. The little girl is just one of those mean girls.”

You can’t really know what version of you lives inside the minds of people you went to school with back in the day. Some people might have a great memory of you, others may have none at all, and some might think you were the biggest B to walk the halls.

One thing is for certain, though, and that’s this: truly, genuinely mean girls raise mean girls.

Confessional #25765087

“I still think about how the “mean girls” treated me in college. I’m 35.”

Confessional #25757593

“Seeing DD8 cry about the mean girls makes me cry, I remember how it felt to just want to fit in. Still feel that way, ‘cause mean girls grow up to be mean women. Teach your kids to be inclusive and kind! It makes such a difference!”

Confessional #25757559

“Sometimes I think the only thing the internet has really accomplished is to provide a new venue on which the "mean girls" can continue their nastiness after high school.”

Confessional #25753533

“I hope the "mean girl moms" know how small they make me feel when they pretend I don't exist. When I'm standing right next to them. I hope one day they have to experience that feeling for themselves, and I hope they are overcome with shame.”

Adult women are just as capable of being competitive, shallow, untrustworthy, non-inclusive, and just plain mean as their younger selves. Some people are truly incapable of growth, and it’s not the burden of their victims to try and explain or fix the behavior. But coping with adult mean girls sure as hell isn’t easy, even if you’ve grown enough mentally and emotionally to know it’s them and not you.

Confessional #24726977

“Church has the worst mean girls. Middle Aged Mean Girls. I wouldn’t even care except that their spawn might hurt my little girl’s feelings. Then my husband and I have agreed that the gloves will come off.”

Confessional #23864674

“I had a friend who sent out a mass email about a friend in our mommy group's unibrow with a photo. Nasty mean girls don't end in high school. Cut ties with her, better off with no 'friends'.”

Confessional #23425250

“I let former HS mean girls friend requests sit in limbo on my FB account. No, you can't spy on my awesome life. Enjoy your mediocrity. You earned it.”

Confessional #23293450

“To all the mean girls: I don't want your husbands, but I sure will rub it in your faces that they want me. This is your karma for calling me anorexic and torturing me. Should've learned from the ugly duckling story. I'm the hot one now and I love it.”

If someone you know is the type of adult to make fun of someone’s looks and put people down because of their body, their appearance, their taste in music, their wardrobe, etc. please know they need help. Big time. Just pity them and move on.

The post From The Confessional: Grown-Up Mean Girls Are The F*cking Worst appeared first on Scary Mommy.

From The Confessional: Dear Partners — Foreplay Is Not Optional

Newsflash, partners! We. need. foreplay. Our clits aren’t just magically aroused 2.5 seconds after you grab our boob while we stir mac and cheese on the stove. Sorry, but that’s not how it works. Before we can even begin to enjoy sex, we need to mentally separate from the 9,000 responsibilities swimming around in our heads. Then we need to relax our bodies and get in the mood.

But hey—you know what helps us do all that? FORE. PLAY.

Kiss us. Touch us. Undress us. Toss in a little oral. Seriously, put some work in because in case you forgot, this isn’t all about getting you off. We’d like to get to the top of the mountain too, bruh. Because when sex feels like we’re at the OBGYN, it’s not good. Like really, really not.

Here are some confessions from women who really need some attention on the patio before jumping straight into the pool.

Confessional #23085037

“Why doesn't DH grasp that foreplay is important? I just am craving actual touch, slow buildup, anticipation, all of that. He basically just goes right to dick in vagina. I'm so damn bored and have talked about it, asked, initiated. He ignores me.”

Confessional #25801445

“I am done with 'checkbox' sex. And I told him that I needed foreplay, more than him, like we did pre-baby.”

Confessional #25797674

“I love my husband so much. I got pregnant a few months after we started dating and everything worked out amazing. He's so kind and perfect. A wonderful father. He's really bad in bed though. I'm talking no foreplay, 3 minute sex. Oh well.”

Confessional #24976499

“Love DH so much but the sex is mediocre at best. He's 100% vanilla, won't entertain anything new, and almost no foreplay for me. I've tried everything to ask, am very giving in bed myself. I'm too young to have missionary sex no orgasm rest of my life!!”

UGH. We are all set with boring, mundane, “checkbox” sex. We deserve more effort from our partners, who should want us to enjoy the experience, right? RIGHT?

Confessional #25828423

“day began with onesided sex where he got his and I (still) didn't. I'd be in a much better mood if I could get laid regularly where both foreplay and DH lasted more than five min. Damn, can I get a break.”

Confessional #25819788

“I miss making out. Kissing for hours. Now we’re lucky if we manage a half hour for sex, including foreplay, 2.5 times a month.”

Confessional #24932125

“DH and I finally got dinner out and a night away at a local hotel bc my mom came to town and kept the 2 kids. I planned it all. I had to beg him for foreplay before sex. So starved for touch but he just fucks and we're done. I fake it all the time.”

Stop rushing through the beginning just to get the job done. Because guess what? You’re not getting the job done.

Confessional #25769063

“Who teaches men how to get a woman aroused?! Is foreplay THAT difficult. Stop skipping right to my puss!!”

Confessional #24698554

“Is good foreplay non-existent anymore? WTF? Hooked up with this guy and he jammed his fingers inside me like a 15 yr-old playing with his 1st vagina. 2 mins later, he tries to stick it in and wondered why I was still not ready. For fucks sakes, people!”

Confessional #23395999

“Why is it that every time DH and I have sex it's all brand new to him? He "forgets" about foreplay and where my clit is. He fumbles around like a virgin and then wonders why I can't get into it.”

Confessional #23511241

“Foreplay with my husband feels like a gynecological exam. Yuck.”

Sometimes it feels like our partner is new at this game. Like seriously, are you 15? Am I at the fucking gynecologist rn? Do better.

Confessional #24129002

“I'm sorry h but pulling your shorts down and saying suck it is not foreplay”

Confessional #23608223

“Told DH last night that just turning off the tv(from watching random stuff not romantic/sexy)& yanking off his boxers is not foreplay..he immediately starts pumping in & out of me when I wasn’t remotely aroused it feels like a damn pelvic exam”

Confessional #25783084

“DH is horrible at foreplay, if he wants to have sex he just gropes at me or raises his eyebrows up and down over and over. Are you fucking kidding me? That is a turn OFF”

We know this isn’t easy to hear, but your foreplay sucks. And not in a good way.

Confessional #23167947

“For the first time, I ended things in the middle of almost-sex. The guy was being selfish and rushing through foreplay. In the past, I went along w/ it b/c it seemed awkward to stop. Now, I said, "You gotta go. This isn't working for me." It was awesome!”

Confessional #22948506

“A few days ago I finally told my DH his foreplay was awful, to my great shock, he decided to research how to be better! For the first time in our 10 yrs together he went down on me and it was amazing! Why did I wait so long to say something?”

Confessional #22886142

“I finally told my DH the reason I've been reluctant to have sex is because his foreplay is awful. He admitted to not trying. I'm ready for my sexual enjoyment to start mattering! Throwing away the lube, if I'm not wet, it's not happening!”

But you know what? Women are finally empowered to say what they want. We are done being silent and suffering through bad sex our whole lives. All set. So get on board, partners, or we’ll find someone who will. (Or we’ll just pleasure ourselves because we know what makes us feel good. We might not really need you at all. Hmmm.)

So here we are, putting our partners on notice: It’s time to up the foreplay game, like STAT. Busy moms who struggle to turn off their “mom-brain,” relax their bodies, and be present in the moment need it, or else sex… well, kind of sucks. We need to be kissed. We need to be touched, and we need to feel desired before you start jamming things into us with a grunt. We need to feel like you’re putting in some fucking effort before the actual fucking. Or else maybe there will be no more fucking. At least not with you, anyway.

The post From The Confessional: Dear Partners — Foreplay Is Not Optional appeared first on Scary Mommy.

From The Confessional: We Need More Than A Macaroni Necklace For Mother’s Day

Ah, May. The flowers bloom, the sun shines, and that wonderful second Sunday day rolls around—a day full of love, relaxation, sleeping in, and cute macaroni necklaces.

Right? Hahaha. Okay, the macaroni necklaces part is true, but do you know a single mom who truly gets to “relax” on Mother’s Day? Who doesn’t have to clean up syrup from the breakfast her family “made” or still get up at 6 a.m. because someone peed the bed or drag the kids to a brunch their mother-in-law organized that everyone is obligated to attend? For many of us, this day ends up being more work than a regular Sunday, and frankly, and we’re over it.

Here’s what we need, fam. Zero obligations—like ZERO—for the day. We need our SO (or someone, anyone really) to take the kids out for many, many hours so that we don’t have to actually hear “mommy mommy mommy” or step in pee or referee fights over the iPad. We want blissful, glorious, quiet solitude. And we definitely don’t want to force our toddlers into khakis so they can take a pic with Grandma at brunch.

Seriously, fam, it’s not hard. Don’t fuck this up because we’ve been pandemic-ing since before last Mother’s Day, and we reaaaaaaally need a break.

Confessional #25780058

“All I wanted for Mother’s Day was a good take out dinner that I didn’t have to plan. I didn’t want to cook. DH never plans ahead, all restaurants aren’t taking last minute orders. No shit! Fuck Mothers Day!”

Confessional #25780018

“I fucking hate my husband. Did NOTHING for me for mothers day, but when fathers day rolls around I'm sure he'll be asking for a blow job. The way things are going he may be getting divorce papers for fathers day.”

Confessional #25779873

“I hate mothers day, every year he goes out of his way to ruin the entire weekend for me. I don't even want anything I just a normal weekend. Instead he sleeps till 3pm, wakes up and finds something to yell at me about and make me feel like crap.”

Confessional #23644565

“The bar for mothers day was set incredibly low right off the bat, when my husband slept til 1pm and left me with a 3 week old, recovering from a c section. Nothing has changed.”

Some of us have known since our very first Mother’s Day that we need to have low expectations (or no expectations). And some of us still have a glimmer of hope every year that maybe our partner won’t fuck this up. But inevitably, they do.

Confessional #25779896

“For Mothers Day I am going shopping ALONE. Going to get a Starbucks too and take my sweet ass time.”

Confessional #25779772

“This year for mothers day, I'm fixing myself bbq ribs, macaroni salad, baked beans, deviled eggs, and strawberry jello poke cake for dessert. H & the kids are free to join me if they wish.”

Confessional #25779082

“Told h and kids (teens) that I'm not cooking for Mothers Day. I've cooked 2-3 meals a day for the quarantine. I'm done, you are on your own. Idc if I don't eat, go to McDonald's for all I care. Get zero help and I need a break”

Confessional #23609538

“Best Mothers Day ever: planting the plants I bought MYSELF, day-drinking, cooking myself a bomb dinner, and getting fkd the way i should by my hot young bf while the kids hang with their dad. So very nice!”

Confessional #12793370

“Bought myself a Tiramisu cake for mothers day... I've already eaten half of it and that fucker was from Costco so it's HUGE!”

So we’ve learned to take Mother’s Day into our own hands and make our own joy. We eat what we want, drink what we want, and do what we want. And it’s glorious AF.

Confessional #25778418

“I better be getting the hope f*ckin diamond for mothers day!!!! Sorry hubs/kiddos...but macaroni pics of me, food, and handmade cards are not gonna give me back my sanity and what LITTLE alone time I use to have. DIAMONDS DAMNIT...DIAMONDS.”

Confessional #25767735

“3 times a year I don't have to cook. My birthday, Mothers Day, and our anniversary. If DH and kids cook rather than going out (rare), they won't let me help with clean up or dishes. They leave it for me to do the next day... I'm not sure that is a gift.”

Confessional #25830759

“DH just told me he got me n his mom the same thing for mother's day...wtf. I find that lazy and very disrespectful. We are different ppl. Fucking do better or just dont get me anything”

Confessional #23634651

“DH ruined mothers day by offering to do everything I usually do and then incessantly complaining about it. The older I get, the more I realize how fucking useless men are. Refuse to raise my son that way. Pissed I can't just have 1 day to relax.”

Confessional #23633040

“Mothers day sucks! Woke up early to a stinky house because dog got sprayed by a skunk, had to bath him. Made my own breakfast. Did yard work. Son tried making me a cake but it didn't turn out so he had an epic melt down. So fucking over this day.”

Sometimes it’s even worse when our families “try” in the gift department but fail miserably. Bruh, your gift kind of sucks, so thanks but no thanks.

Confessional #25779703

“Hate mothers day- mine is a bitch and my kids dont care at all. Everything is forced to act caring but its all lies and trash”

Confessional #25779261

“I fucking hate Mothers Day and I absolutely refuse to spend any of my time, money, or effort to honor a woman who doesn't deserve it.”

Confessional #23607006

“trying to circumvent awkward mothers day call tomorrow by making it today-mom not answering. sure she will do the call while I am hosting company. I will ignore then be stuck calling her later again. sick of her shit. need peace from her games.”

Confessional #23562031

“I have always hated Mothers Day! If my mom didn't get a nice gift, hell to pay. Now she's gone... Still hate it!”

Confessional #23529943

“As a kid, my dad used to take me & my sister shopping for a mothers day gift for mom. I hated having to spend money on that rude, stupid cunt. She didn't deserve anything. Dad hated her too. Everyone in the family was afraid of her. Glad I'm estranged.”

And finally, Mother’s Day can carry a lot of baggage and trigger a great deal of pain too—particularly if your own mom is a shitty person.

So a day that’s supposed to be a happy one — and a day we’re supposed to feel loved and spoiled and appreciated — is for many of us, the exact opposite of that. That’s why many moms do Mother’s Day their way and have stopped relying on others to make it joyful. And why you should do the same. Screw your narcissistic MIL or selfish husband or lazy ass kids who forgot all about it. Go somewhere for the day—a coffee shop, a nail salon, a book store—and treat yourself to all the things you deserve. Or, if you can’t escape, drop a little something special into your online cart—a new pair of sandals or that wreath you’ve been eyeing for your front door.

And when you hit “complete purchase” or when you drive out of your driveway and wave goodbye to your family, make sure you say “Happy Mother’s Day, Mom” to yourself. Because you deserve it.

The post From The Confessional: We Need More Than A Macaroni Necklace For Mother’s Day appeared first on Scary Mommy.